Just in case you thought your wedding was just about you and the love of your life, I am here to burst your bubble.

From the moment you announce your engagement, everyone you know and love will be attempting to find their place in your wedding. Will your cousin be a bridesmaid? Your aunt wants to know because her daughter is pretty sure she needs to be dress shopping. Will your college roommate get a plus one? She’s not dating someone in particular, but she has her eye on someone who would look great in a suit. Is Mary from middle school even invited?

Our recommendation is to take someone you trust, with a backbone of steel (most likely your maid of honor, or a family member), and crown her your “NO” girl. What do I mean by this? Any time someone asks you for a special request or clarification that you feel guilty saying no to, send them to your no girl. They will just think you are busy and you trust this girl with all of your biggest wedding decisions, but what she will know is that anyone who gets directed to her by the bride automatically gets a “no” to whatever it is that they are asking. This person will know exactly the way to let your aunt, roommate, and middle school friend down easily and definitely. It is also the way for you to wash your hands of any guilt that may bring you. 

I grew up Catholic, so I know guilt quite well, but I have seen the way that wedding planning can tear a bride apart with all of the people she feels like she has to let down on her big day. So many people want so much from you that the budget just doesn’t allow for. It is also a day that you will look back on for the rest of your life. Make sure that everyone involved is there for a reason. We’ve already talked about your wedding guest selection in a past blog though (linked here). 

If you haven't already, call up your “no” girl to inform her of her duties, and then kick back and relax because you just lost tons of emotional weight off your shoulders. Chances are, your girl will be thrilled to take on her duties and wear it like an invisible cape over her shoulders at all times. 

Cheers to the rest of wedding planning gone smoothly!

Lauren Allen, Author

Lauren is a bridal consultant and self-published author, with a background in celebrity styling and bridal make up artistry. You can find her with an oat milk cappuccino in the morning, and a glass of Cabernet at night, her real passions. Get enough wine in her and she will tell you about her perfectly planned wedding. Just promise not to ask about the groom, that’s one detail she’s still working on. Lauren is based in NYC and her book “How to Be 23” can be found here

Planning your wedding festivities takes months, if not a year or more. Your seating chart has been organized to perfection, the DJ has your playlist down pat, you soon will pick up your perfectly tailored gown. There are a few things we think you might have forgotten to plan for the day-of getting ready process though. Feel free to forward this list to your Maid of Honor because you already have enough to worry about that morning!

1. Hand Steamer

If you don’t own one already, go ahead and order it now and then thank me later. This is a life saver for mornings when you'd rather spend more time sipping coffee than ironing your work shirt. It will also be used for everyone in the wedding party. While you are getting ready, have your bridesmaids take turns steaming all of the bridesmaids dresses, your wedding gown, and your veil. Once steamed hang the gowns and veils until you get dressed and you all will be picture perfect. Also, we recommend the men get in on this tip too, there’s nothing sloppier looking than a wrinkled suit

2. Sewing Kit

This is likely to be the most photographed day of your life. We can’t allow for any unfixed wardrobe malfunctions! Make sure to have a sewing kit with you in case of emergencies like a zipper not staying in place, or a button coming loose. Chances are high that you won’t need it, but if you do need that needle and thread you will save yourself a lot of time and heartache knowing it’s ready to go. This recommendation comes straight from personal experience of having to sew a bride into her gown an hour before she walked down the aisle

3. Snacks and Water

You have spent hours selecting the food for your cocktail hour and sit down dinner, making sure there is something for everyone while also representing you and your fiance properly. Have you thought about what you will snack on before the hors d’oeuvres are served? We understand you want to save your appetite for the overpriced food you already ordered, but no one wants you hangry and dehydrated while saying your vows so make sure to plan your getting ready snacks and drinks (water and maybe a side or 2 of champagne) ahead of time

4. Toothbrush and Toothpaste

After all of your snacks that will most likely get covered in hairspray from the hair stylist trying to touch up your hair, you will inevitably want to brush your teeth one more time before your lipstick goes on and you are ready to kiss your HUSBAND! (or wife, wherever your heart has led you) A mint could also help, but a good teeth brushing is always refreshing and will make sure your teeth are as white as can be for all of the pictures that will be taken throughout the day

5. Final Payment Envelopes

Weddings involve hiring a lot of vendors to put together a lot of pieces of the puzzle that is your dream wedding. Many of them will expect to be paid once they finish their job. We recommend filling pre labeled envelopes with the payments, thank you notes, and tips for your vendors. Select a designated person to hand them out at the appropriate times of the night. This could be a family member or a bridesmaid, but it has to be someone organized and trustworthy

You’re now fully prepped to make one of the best days of your life go smoothly so you can enjoy yourself and be fully present with your new spouse!

Lauren Allen, Author

Lauren is a bridal consultant and self-published author, with a background in celebrity styling and bridal make up artistry. You can find her with an oat milk cappuccino in the morning, and a glass of Cabernet at night, her real passions. Get enough wine in her and she will tell you about her perfectly planned wedding. Just promise not to ask about the groom, that’s one detail she’s still working on. Lauren is based in NYC and her book “How to Be 23” can be found here

You have successfully overcome your list of bridal salons, menu selections, and even flower choices. Now is the time to sit down and make the hardest list of all. The guest list. That looming list of all of your loved ones, and the people that your parents think are priorities. They might be the life of the party (or they might be the best gift givers), but you have to consider what your venue allows and what your budget can handle. 

After years of working with brides, one thing that I have noticed is the stress that revolves around narrowing down the guest list. One rule of thumb that I have come to appreciate is that if you wouldn’t want to spend time with and buy someone dinner on an average day, then don’t feel the need to on your wedding day. Besides that, we have compiled a breakdown of the best ways to tackle this no-so-glamorous part of wedding planning: 

1. Make your list with your significant other before handing over the pen to your parents 

The first draft of your guest list should strictly be written between you and your fiancé. You will have plenty of outside opinions on who should be included in your nuptials, but the base line should be the close friends and family that you couldn’t imagine getting married without. After that list is completed you will know how many seats you have left to hand over to your mom and mother-in-law to use as they please. This will guarantee that your requirements will be met, and let your family feel like they were part of the planning. 

2. A-list and B-list invitees 

There is one secret about your wedding that your guests never need to find out about. Your B-list. Most venues are just as focused on their minimums as they are their maximums. Your A-list will get their invites first and will be asked to RSVP in a timely manner, giving you an idea of how many extra seats you will have available for your B-list. Those invites will be sent before the A-list RSVP deadline expires just in case the two get mixed up, but still with enough time to get all of the answers back before your caterer needs the final head count. 

Make sure your B-list is organized in order of importance, so if 10 people on your A-list can’t make it, the first 10 on your B-list can be sent their invites. Also, keep families and friend groups on the same list so they can’t compare invite delivery times or RSVP by dates… You’ll thank me later for that note. 

3. Decide on children attendance 

This is your wedding, and only you can decide if you want children to be a part of your big day, or if you want this to be an adults-only event. Make this decision early on and then stick to it. Do you want your niece that's under one, but not children older than that? Make it clear from the beginning and allow no exceptions. Most parents will be more than happy for an adults night out, so don’t feel guilty about your decision either way. This will also help you narrow down the amount of seats needed and allows for more possible B-list attendees! 

4. Plus one distribution  

Times have changed and it is no longer required to give everyone you invite a plus one to your wedding. You do not need to feed your second cousin’s latest hookup dinner just because you offered them a date option. Being selective with the plus ones you hand out will allow you more flexibility in your guest list because you will know exactly how many seats you are filling. Don’t worry, there will be plenty of people there for anyone coming alone to mingle with. You never know if your wedding is the reason for the next wedding! You should know the people you are inviting well enough to know if they will need a plus one or not. 

There have been rules in the past about “no ring, no bring” but that doesn’t always apply anymore. Just like children, though, you have the option to make a date rule and stick to it! They don’t live together? You don’t like him? You haven’t even met her? All reasons to not give a plus one if you don’t want to! 

This is your wedding day. It is a day to be surrounded by everyone you and your fiancé know and love. Make sure every name on your guest brings you joy and fond memories. Also make sure that they leave the embarrassing stories of you from the past, in the past unless you are ready to get roasted on your wedding night during toasts. 

COVID note: We know that 2020 weddings have not been unraveling the way they were expected to, and we don’t know what weddings in the next year will look like, but we want you to be prepared whether your wedding is 10 people or 300 people!

Lauren Allen, Author

Lauren is a bridal consultant and self-published author, with a background in celebrity styling and bridal make up artistry. You can find her with an oat milk cappuccino in the morning, and a glass of Cabernet at night, her real passions. Get enough wine in her and she will tell you about her perfectly planned wedding. Just promise not to ask about the groom, that’s one detail she’s still working on. Lauren is based in NYC and her book “How to Be 23” can be found here

Bridal gown shopping can be a daunting part of your wedding checklist.

If you are like us and love shopping, the sheer amount of gown options is overwhelming. If you dread the idea of stepping into a store to find a new pair of jeans, then gown shopping is something that you will put off as long as possible. No matter which one describes you best, what you need to understand is that your bridal consultant will use her expertise to find you the most memorable dress of your life. The experience should make you feel beautiful, confident, and ready to marry the person of your dreams.

To help you prepare for your bridal appointment, we have created a list of questions you should be ready to ask and answer during the course of your consultation. We recommend going in with an open mind, a Pinterest board of inspiration pictures, and neutral colored underwear.  

The top 5 questions you should be asking your professional bridal consultant: 

1. What would you recommend based on my body type?

- No matter what, though, you should choose your gown based off of what makes you feel best, not just what you are expected to wear. Also know that bridal sizes are significantly different than street sizes. Leave the numbers to the consultant and know that you will never be ordering that size again! 

2. How do you bustle this gown?

- Make sure your consultant shows you how the bustle will look on the gown. You should also record the tailor showing you the final bustle so that even after a glass of champagne, your maid of honor will be able to get you ready for your first dance with no delays. 

3. How would you accessorize my dream gown?

- Sometimes you can get discounts by ordering your accessories at the same location as your gown! Sticking to one location for all of your gown needs is the best way to ensure consistency and possible discounts. 

4. What is delivery time right now?

- Are you asking for something on your gown that would be considered custom and would up the cost and the turnaround time?

5. How much are alterations?

- Also remember that alterations mean different things at different salons, so make sure your consultant goes into detail about what they consider alterations. Does their price include full fittings, a bustle, and steaming? 

The top 5 questions your bridal consultant should be asking you: 

1. What is your budget?

- When deciding on a budget don't forget about alterations, shoes, and any other accessories you may want. Be specific about the budget you give your consultant, she/he will need to know how much you would like to spend on your gown in order to pull properly from the sample options. 

2. What makes you feel beautiful?

- This is not what your mom thinks, what you think you should think, or what some stranger on the internet wants you to think (Hi!). Your consultant wants to know exactly what makes you feel your most stunning when you look in the mirror. 

3. How do you picture yourself looking on your wedding day?

- This means picturing yourself surrounded by your flowers, your venue, the bridesmaids dresses you will be selecting after your bridal appointment. Your gown will set the tone for your entire wedding. 

4. What are your favorite features of your body?

- Do you like your collar bones? Let’s show them off! Do you like your legs? Get a gown with a slit!

5. What are your least favorite features on your body?

- Would you prefer to cover your arms? Maybe think about doing an off-the-shoulder moment. Don’t like cleavage? Let’s look at high neck options and switch things up! 

There are thousands of wedding gowns for you to choose from. Enjoy the shopping process, but never forget the reason for the shopping adventure. You stopped dating after you met the man (or woman) of your dreams, stop shopping once you find the gown of your dreams!

Lauren Allen, Author

Lauren is a bridal consultant and self-published author, with a background in celebrity styling and bridal make up artistry. You can find her with an oat milk cappuccino in the morning, and a glass of Cabernet at night, her real passions. Get enough wine in her and she will tell you about her perfectly planned wedding. Just promise not to ask about the groom, that’s one detail she’s still working on. Lauren is based in NYC and her book “How to Be 23” can be found here