Tips for Bridesmaid Dress Shopping

When it comes to bridesmaid shopping, I know the frustration can get REAL. Back in my days of being a consultant in the bridesmaid department, I’ve had brides tell me how the stress and anger surrounding the process actually made them lose their friends!

Yes, you read that correctly: women are breaking up with their friends over a wedding. Granted, this frustration usually develops over multiple instances, including the bridesmaid dress, but still, I’ve seen my fair share of fighting and crying in the dressing room.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but I have one word for you when it comes to bridesmaid shopping: COMPROMISE

So, I have tips for ya’ll on bridesmaid dress shopping, because the #1 thing I always hear is “I had no idea the process would be like this”

BRIDES, my loves, these are for you:

Not everyone can or wants to be a bridesmaid.

I know you picked your best girls (or guys) to stand by your side, but the modern truth is not everyone has the financial or emotional capacity to fulfill that role. So save your friendship and give your people an “out” if they need it. No feelings hurt.

2. Respect the financial investment involved.

Gone are the days of cheap dresses. Please understand that your girls will have to shell out money, even for the ugliest dress (not forgetting the extra fees for shipping, rush, and alterations). So unless you’re paying for it, your bridesmaids should have a little bit of a say in the dress they’re buying and keep in mind they really do want to look their best for your special day.

3. Not all bodies are created equal.

Going off of #2, be mindful that dress shopping can be hard for those that are insecure about their bodies. Especially if they go into a store that doesn’t even carry their size or something just isn’t physically possible (big boobs, meet backless dress). So if you’d like your girls to all wear the same dress (which is totally fine!), pick something that’s universally flattering and comfortable.

BRIDESMAIDS, here you go:

It’s not about you.

This isn’t your wedding. I’m all about you having your opinion heard regarding the dress you’re being forced to pay for, but at the end of the day there’s a whole group of people to consider and that can add to the already stressed bride. Keep the bride’s wedding vision in mind while you share your thoughts.

2. HELP the bride instead of freaking out at her.

Brides are stressed humans. If she’s trying to make you wear a long satin evening gown for a beach wedding, GENTLY point out that chiffon or a light jersey would cause less heat strokes. If she can’t figure out a color that will flatter everyone’s skin tones, suggest something more neutral. Just showing her that you’re on her side to make her wedding amazing can do wonders for keeping everyone calm. She would probably even love a little inspiration help!

3. Be honest without being a b*tch

Going off of #1, emotions are running high right now. Remember that there’s a NICE way to give your opinion while the bride is trying to dress you up like a cupcake. I swear, she really does want you to look amazing. If it’s a money issue, have an honest talk with her and see if there’s a solution you can work out together.

One last note for EVERYONE:

* It’s a PROCESS. It takes TIME. Don’t expect to go into a store and leave in under an hour with your order placed (the majority of my customers spent 3-5 hours at the store) or jump online and buy from the first website you land on. Be patient with each other.

See? You can have your cake and eat it too, it just might be a different flavor than you were expecting (but at least you still get cake). So bridesmaids, help your bride find you something amazing to wear that fits her vision; and brides, respect your girls opinions and everything will go much more smoothly.

My inbox is always open for anyone needing to tap into my bridesmaids dress knowledge. Happy shopping!